Comparison

Have you ever felt like people around you are doing better than you? or have you ever felt like life is moving by fast and you're stuck in one place?

If yes then you might compare yourself to others often.

People compare or evaluate their traits by judging how better or worse they are than others.

Studies show that as much as 10% of an average person's daily thoughts involve a comparison of themselves, but why is it that we do that?

Why do people compare themselves?

It is human nature to compare and it is a common part of social lives. Our ancestors have always lived and survived in groups which is why humans are said to be social animals due to which people compare themselves and use the information as a way to see where they stand in a group or to measure their personal growth. People who have low self-esteem or are highly insecure tend to compare themselves excessively as a way to either validate themselves or to pinpoint what they think their weaknesses are.

Is comparison beneficial or harmful?

Theodore Roosevelt called comparison "the thief of joy" and Nancy Pearcy once stated that "Competition is always a good thing. It forces us to do our best. A monopoly renders people complacent and satisfied with mediocrity" So what is it? Is comparison something which helps you grow or something which brings you down?

There are benefits to comparison such as

• Promotes Growth

• Motivating

• Feedback loop

In contrast, there are also disadvantages such as

• Poor self-esteem

• Arrogance and pride

• Creates divisions

• May demotivate some people

So with such contrasting pros and cons of comparison should you compare yourself to others or not?

There is no correct answer to this as every person deals with and perceives comparison differently. What you can do is understand how you react to comparison and based on that decide whether you want to continue to do so or not. You can understand your reaction to comparison by the following

• How you behave in competitive environments- Notice whether you find yourself in a good mental state and performing better in competitive environments, if yes then you may benefit from comparison but if you find yourself struggling with your mental health and performing poorly in competitive environments comparison is something you should not indulge in.

• Your reaction to people doing better than you- Let's say you have been studying really hard for a test and your goal is to get above 85%, now when you get your result as 87% you are really happy but later on when talking to others you get to know that some people score 100% how do you react to this? do you feel better or worse about yourself? If you feel inferior about yourself it is a clear indication that you should stop comparing yourself. If you're feeling worse about yourself solely due to other people doing better than you despite making progress it means that your self-worth and esteem are tied entirely to comparison which isn't healthy.

• You already struggle with low self-esteem- If you already have low self-esteem, a smart and healthy thing to do is not compare yourself. People with low self-esteem are more sensitive to a negative and unhealthy mental state and comparison will only make it worse.

How to stop comparing yourself

If comparison is human nature then how do you stop?

The truth of the matter is that you can't stop. Our minds will continue to do this but what can be controlled is the degree to which we do it and how much it affects us.

• Compete with yourself- Don't get caught up in comparing yourself to others. Instead, take a moment to reflect on how far you've come and focus on how you can continue to improve. By comparing yourself to your past self, you'll be able to see the progress you've made and feel motivated to keep pushing forward.

• Surround yourself with supportive people- Instead of keeping friendships based on competition and comparison, surround yourself with people who make you feel good about yourself and genuinely want the best for you. If you can't find these people, try and keep an emotional distance from competitive people who make you feel inferior.

• Create a healthy social media feed- Follow accounts based on self-love and acceptance and limit your activity on social media depending on how much it affects you.

• Judge yourself by your own standards- Instead of focusing on how others view you or judge you focus on how you view yourself by your own standards. If you think you don't meet the standards which you have for yourself which are not influenced by others then take that as an indication to work harder but at the same time celebrate your progress.

Comparison is something which can affect someone who is sensitive or has low self-esteem a lot and everyone feels bad about themselves due to comparison at some point because of reasons such as marks, followers, appearance, friends, etc. At the end of the day, it's important to remember that your priority should be your happiness and anything which affects it is not worth indulging in. Your own happiness is much more of a motivator than a comparison.

Artwork-

https://in.pinterest.com/pin/1618549861548883/